Floods, Belly Breathing and Acupuncture Points

Last spring, Bismarck ND was threatened with a "100 year flood" which began to wash away the island and the land below the river bluffs. The city united forces as patrons sand bagged along the river, yet helplessly watched as lowest parts of the city slowly sank underwater ruining homes along the river and forcing zoo animals to be relocated. At its worst prediction, the flood could have put some houses above the river bluffs completely underwater. What was even worse is that it could take another two months before they would be able to sigh with relief that the worst was over. Luckily, by that 2 months mark in July, water began to reced and at worse, many homes along the river were permanently damaged, but at least people were able to relax again that it wasn't any worse. So what was the cause of this once in a lifetime flood that flirted with potentially disastrous outcomes? During the winter season, some 450 miles west in Montana, the mountains were enduring some of the heaviest snowfall in a long time. As spring beckoned and snow began to melt, water levels rose thus impacting all rivers, lakes, streams and channels that connected Billings, MT to Bismarck, ND. What was happening some 450 miles away was stranglely connected to Bismarck.

Next month (if this cycle is unsuccessful), I will start Clomid again. One of the side effects of Clomid is being extremely "hormonal" (otherwise known as the "moody TTC woman"), coupled with temporary weight gain and bloating around the time of ovulation. It doesn't happen to every girl, but these are the most common side effects (I only had temporary weight gain in December). Have you ever wondered why you take a pill and experience side effects that are seemingly unrelated? To my surprise, my acupuncturist stuck a needle in both of my ear lobes last week (I know--what?!). She proceeded to put needles in the usual places along my arms, legs, feet, and belly. TCM encompasses holistic healing at its core by healing the entire body in an attempt to re-balance the body's energy and hormones. They approach treatment not by targeting the source of your ailment (in this case-my uterus or ovaries), but by evaluating the imbalances in the entire body which consequently are creating the unwanted condition or disease.

Our body is regulated by hormones and signals sent throughout the body and to put it in the most simplistic terms, ovulation is triggered by detecting the amount of estrogen and other hormones in the system which in turn, triggers OTHER hormones such as follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH), progesterone, and several others I'm sure that I'm forgetting. When all the hormonal levels are just right, ovulation occurs. This is merely one example of what the body undergoes all day long as it reads signals turning on and off other hormones. TCM and acupuncture treat the body by identifying points located in one of the 12 meridians that allign the body. The image below shows you how these 12 channels allow Qi (pronounced "chi" and synonymous to energy) flows through the body. The same principles that explain the causes for the 100-year Bismarck flood can be applied to accupunture in that if one area of the body is blocked, it can impact other areas because they're all connected through a series of channels. The points you see in the image below are used to stimulate channels thus encouraging energy and blood flow to that area again in an effort to re-balance the body again.

 When you take Clomid, you're not just taking it stimulate your ovaries, you are also stimulating other hormones that seemingly have nothing to do with ovulation. Yet, in the a strange way, they're all connected, and this is the philosophy behind TCM. While a western medicine doctor will look at low progesterone and try to pinpoint the problem by evaluating all the hormones and organs associated with ovulation, TCM will look at the imbalances in the body holistically that could have triggered this condition in the first place and work on stimulating those areas even if they don't seem to have any association with ovulation or the menstrual cycle (hint: they do).

Ever notice how when you're starting to panic or worry about something, sometimes just a few deep breaths manage to soothe you? After my acupuncturist looked at my belly and told me I had toned abs (she's sweet.....delusional--but sweet....) she explained that sometimes it is difficult to take in deep belly breaths because the abs are so tight. Sitting in an office chair for 8 hours a day probably doesn't help either. Our bodies are in fight or flight mode when we start breathing in and out through the lungs because physiologically speaking, breathing through the lungs triggers the brain that we're in danger. Our brains can't differentiate between daily work stressors and running away from a lion. It's all stress regardless of what the outcome is. When we take in deep breaths, we're telling our bodies that we're calm and ready to make babies (Ok, I added that last part in myself). This has been my focus for the past week to take in deep breaths whenever I remember. I'm curious if those people you meet that are annoyingly happy all the time are really just deep belly breathers. Belly breathing can calm our demeanor and perhaps subdue some of the reactions we have from everyday stressors that would otherwise be easily provoked, and hey--that sounds pretty healthy, right? Perhaps this will soothe me before my test date.

With that being said, I have to be honest that I debated about revealing to all of you where I'm at in my cycle because I do like to keep some parts of this process private. Not because I'm a hoarder of secrets (most of you know that I'm a very open and honest person), but because talking about the details of my cycles with too many people only elicits more discussion which defeats the purpose of "trying not to think about it". Granted, most of my (limited) readers right now know where I'm at in my cycle. As best as I can, I wanted to invite you into the agony and excited anticipation that comes with the unknown that is about to reveal itself within the next few days. Once we do get pregnant, I will be sharing this blog with the rest of the world, and I would like for those people to read this post in retrospect with a slight chuckle using their hindsight knowledge thinking, "oh if only she knew what was coming!.....".

I'm currently 8 days past ovulation.

Statistically speaking, only about 10% of pregnant girls will actually get a positive pregnancy test on 10 days past ovulation, and the average day for the first positive pregnancy test is 13.6 days past ovulation. The problem for me is that I usually don't need to test. To my own body's credit, my cycles are like clockwork and therefore, extremely predictable (which is a blessing since some girls are very irregular which makes tracking ovulation frustrating). My pre-period spotting shows up ever so faintly on 9 days past ovulation and lasts for 2 days before my period starts (which is the reason the I started checking my progesterone levels a few months ago since that is a few days earlier than "normal"). This means that 8 and 9 days past ovulation are the worst to endure. All my hopes are pent up on these two days with tomorrow being the big day for me because I will be 9 days past ovulation. Even though spotting shows up, I do test just once to be sure that I'm not having a chemical pregnancy (I've never had a positive test).

Every month, around this time during my luteal phase (the time frame between ovulation and your next period), I feel sporadic rushes of excitement go through me at certain times of the day as I day dream about it being just a matter of few days that I may find out some very exciting life-altering news. I imagine what it will be like to tell my husband (I decided 5 months ago of how I'm going to share the news with him), how I'm going to tell my parents (have that planned for the past 3 months already), and what its going to feel like to walk around with a swelling belly as I prepare to bring another life into this world. All I can feel is excitement during this time.

They say the average couple takes 9 months to get pregnant and I'm on my 9th month. Most of the so-called "long-timer" girls in my Facebook group got pregnant on or slightly before the 1 year point. What makes this waiting game so exciting yet nerve-wracking is that the positive pregnancy test will come when I least expect it. I'm not saying that I'm going to forget that we're TTC and then one day think, "oh hey, I feel nauseous.....could I be pregnant?" and then be shocked that I am. By saying "when you least expect it" I mean that I am not expecting to have a positive pregnancy test this month. I know it sounds cynical, but a human brain is wired for habitual thoughts and habitual actions (this helps us survive by learning what has always happened in the past to predict the future). Once we've learned the pattern, we stick to it. Having 8 months in a row of failed successes, my habitual side of me does not expect to see a positive when I test. That is what I mean by "it will happen when you least expect it". It seems like for long-timers that there is no rhyme or reason for why one month is more successful than another. Therefore, I don't expect to see a positive, but at the same time, I realize that when I do finally see the positive lines on the test it's not going to be preceded with thoughts like, "oh I just KNOW that I'm pregnant!" It's going to be preceded by thoughts of what I've always known--that it's always been negative....I can't wait to be surprised!

So, say a little prayer for me, keep your fingers crossed and let's hope for the best! Cheers!