This is perhaps the last blog post I will be writing before the baby is born. I'm 39+5 and have a tentative plan to be induced 2 weeks from today if needed, but I don't think I'll be pregnant for that long. That means, I will have a baby in my arms anytime between now and two weeks from now. As I type this we are wrapping up Minnesota's first official snowstorm of the season which dumped about 4-6 inches of snow in the Twin Cities area. For the past week or two I've admittedly been scrutinizing the weather for any slight indication that a massive snowstorm would sweep through right around the time I was due in hopes that the pressure dropping storm would induce my labor. It was wishful and silly thinking, but it made it fun since I had nothing else to keep me hopeful that I'd deliver early. As the snow starts to taper off while I type this blog post I'm coming to the realization that I'm still pregnant, still not contracting and therefore likely not going to go into labor because of the storm.
Traffic was awful today and I left work extra early so that I could beat the rush hour home. I sat on the couch this afternoon feeling guilty about how lazy I was being and decided that regardless that I'm 2 days shy of my due date, there is no reason to not go out and get a head start on the shoveling so that my husband doesn't have to do it all himself (poor guy). I only went out for a short time and ensured that I wasn't doing anything too taxing (just the "wimpy" stuff), but as I stood out there I had to laugh at myself and wondered what the neighbors who could see me were thinking. So I stopped, went inside and read TIME magazine instead. That seemed more fitting and appropriate.
When strangers ask me when I'm due I love every second of saying, "Friday!" and not having to add any extra words in front of it to indicate WHICH Friday because I really do mean, "yes, 2 days from now Friday". I'm told that I don't look like I'm about ready to pop, and I'm certainly not acting like it. It's hard to believe on so many levels that we are finally to this milestone because while going through infertility struggles and even in early pregnancy (and throughout my entire pregnancy) I envied the girls that were about ready to deliver and considered them so lucky. And now it's me.
The entire pregnancy and especially in these past few weeks I kept waiting for these miserable pregnancy symptoms to kick in--the aches, pains, frequent urination, heart burn, extreme fatigue, etc. and it just hasn't happened yet. What a lucky girl I am to not have that added stress. Hopefully that will continue, but it does make me wonder if there are many other girls out there that have great pregnancies and we only hear about the miserable ones because we're inclined to think that pregnancy is about sacrifice and feeling pain so that we can bring another life into the world. It makes me wonder if all the misery described of childbirth and even parenting in those first few weeks are only true for a handful. Maybe you all are reading this and laughing at how naive I'm being because I have "no idea what's coming", so I guess I shall wait and see.
Jon and I have started to wrap up the major priorities of getting ready for the baby--the nursery is done, the baby essentials are purchased, and the house was cleaned (keyword being "was" because it's already back to its usual state again). I set some more personal goals for those final weeks including finishing Hunger Games Catching Fire, seeing the Catching Fire movie, finishing up the baby's Christmas stocking (photos of this to come), sleeping extra late on the weekends (this is not working out, I'm awake by 6:30am and I blame pregnancy hormones), getting the Christmas letter and envelopes addressed, shopping and wrapping the Christmas gifts, and just embracing every last minute I can with my husband, friends and family. The long Thanksgiving holiday weekend allowed me to achieve many of these personal goals, but I still have another 2 hours to do on the Christmas stocking so it should probably be done before the baby arrives, but if it isn't then I will steal some time after the baby is born to finish it up before Christmas. Once that is complete I will post a photo to share.
Coworkers have begun the, "you're still here?" comments even though I haven't even reached my due date. Instead of getting annoyed (because really--do I need the reminder that I'm "still" pregnant?) I now embrace it because I'm finally OK with the baby coming out--I am sure the brain and lungs are fully developed and I feel as "ready" as I will ever be. The average first time mom goes 8 days overdue, so it could be awhile yet so anticipating delivering early is a bit of wishful (but fun) thinking.
My aforementioned thoughts describe an excited and completely content 39 week pregnant girl who can't wait for this baby to get out. And yes, that is true--some of the time. The other part of the time I'm panicking at the idea that my life is about to do a complete 180. No more sleeping in, no more laying on the couch watching TV shows on DVD whenever I feel like it, no more being early and on time to everything (this is my specialty), and perhaps most importantly, it's no longer "just the two of us". Jon is my best friend and we generally enjoy each other's company even when we're doing the least stimulating of things. Sometimes I wonder if the baby is going to change that relationship because I'm happy with the way it is right now. However, as humans, we have the amazing capacity to adapt to new realities, and I know and trust that I'm never ever going to regret having this baby and that it's only going to enhance our lives. It's hard to know what that really entails without experiencing it, but I know that billions of people who relish in their children and the happiness that ensues can't all be wrong about it....
.....But I do think I'm going to miss that thing called "sleep".
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